Oregon Trip

After a long wonderful, but also sad summer I decided to take a trip. My sis in law talks about Oregon a lot so I decided with the extra money I made this summer and I just went. I am trying to just live a little if possible and not be too stingy with money, but not to go too crazy anyways so I went for 4 days last week. I had the best time going non stop. First thing we did was go to the Portland temple. As I have said before I love temples. As I sat outside it the songs I know My Redeemer Lives and The Spirit Of God were in my head. I testify I know the truth to these songs when I am inside or outside of the temple I feel the words these songs express deep in my heart. Then we drove to the coast where we did 5 hikes in 2 days. I love hiking and being in nature. We did two waterfalls, ocean top hikes and a few lighthouses. Plus in the mornings at 6 am we walked around the beach for two hours. So pleasant to be up when the sun is coming up and walking by the ocean in the fog. I loved Oregon so much that I am really looking into moving there. I love all the outdoor things you can do and the crazy wonderful beach people. I really do love all the different kinds of people there are in this world. No matter what their beliefs are or how they choose to live their life they all deserve to be loved because the Lord loves them. Everyone has a purpose in this life and a value. I love people's quirks. Life would be boring without them. I am a quirky person and that is why I think I love quirky people. I respect life no matter how you live it differently from me, I respect that power and gift of free will and choice. No one is not invaluable even horrible unpleasant people. I believe in showing them with love and compassion not matter if they hate me. Hopefully one day their hearts will be softened and they realize how amazing life is. Anyways the trip to Oregon and the people I met made me reflect on that a lot. I am also not perfect in that because I do admit I can be critical sometimes especially with people within my own faith. That is one of the things I am working on. I am harder on them than I am of people in other religions and lifestyles. Anyways, so in love with Oregon and going back soon to do more hiking and exploring.
Other news I have been dating. I am enjoying this. I have not enjoyed dating in quite sometime so enjoying having fun and just being silly. I am a silly person but don't expose that often but with my aunt's sad and tragic death I have really just pushing myself out of my shell and embracing my quirkiness more than ever. I have always loved who I am but have not opened up myself to others, but that is changing. I know I am a fun, silly, loving, and a great gal and it is time people saw me for me. No more fear of not understanding me. If they like me great if not that is ok too. As long as I am kind to people and loving that is all that matters. I have a lot of love to give.
So goals this month are live to the fullest, love as much as I can and be the best person possible and just have fun. I love my life and am just so happy in it.

my new fave thing to do beside genealogy

So lately I have been making playlists. I believe that you can set your life to music to certain times of your life. I love music!!! So I started off with a period when I was in love with Andy. It starts off amazing then gets sadder, to being pissed, and finally how it works out that I am glad to have experienced it. The song First Time Ever I Saw Your Face was playing in the car when, after 2 years of on and off dating, i realized I loved Andy and that song helped me realize that. It helped me make sense of all those silly emotions I was having. I am a girl who doesnt fall in love easily, but when I do I love hard. I realize now how silly and dumb I was at expressing that love and am embarrassed at some things, but I was young and in love for the first time. I didnt know what I was doing. Very funny and sad at the same time. At least I know I wont make the same mistakes again. Still I have only loved once. Anyways I have also done songs that helped my spirituality grow. It started off with the basics then how it grew by the spirit and the hardships i faced to get me to where I am now. The happiness i have and grateful to have finally gotten to a beautiful place that keeps getting more beautiful and wonderful. That is because I know my Savior better now and am committed to serving Him the best I can. Now I am working on my childhood one. So the list playing now on my blog is my first love about Andy. I hope you enjoy it. What else is new with me is I am dating again. Scary i know and I have met a lot of jerks sadly. I have had guys call me fat, say I should feel lucky they are attracted to me, or i dont date girls who dont take care of their bodies. Honestly I feel maybe I should stop again because I have too much respect and love for myself to go through this crap. I mean I have it all, I am smart, funny, have a beautiful face, i am doing my best to live the gospel everyday plus growing in it everyday, I go to the temple often, I would make a great mother, I am amazing kisser (i have been told), I am pretty dang sexy (again I have been told), and I am just a plain fun good woman. The only thing is I am a chunk (not enough to call fat or chunky, a chunk), which I have lost a lot already, but it takes time men. Good grief I dont deserve all this. Getting my heartbroken by probably the love of my life and him choosing someone else was cruddy enough. Oh well at least I loved. I am not going to stop i just have to deal with the jerks to find the one who deserves all this!! ( I hope people understand that I am not conceded, just confident. Also they caught on to my sarcasm. I really do think I am a great gal, but I know I have a lot of work to do to keep changing and growing to what I am suppose to be. I am not perfect at all, but do my best to be my best self. I am not better than anyone. I just wanted to add that note.) Other than that I am still happy and still trying to get over my aunt's death, but I am more at peace about it than before. Also celebrated my birthday by taking a spontaneous trip to Wendover. I was in Tooele at a star gazing party and my Aunt's wife said hey do you want to go to Wendover? I said sure why not and went. It was silly fun and I did gamble for the first time which I dont get how people do that all day. I was pretty bored after a while. I only gambled $20. It was a great cultural experience and who knows if I would ever do it again. At least I tried it right? Life is still going very well.

July, a rough month and tired of mormons getting a bad wrap, but oh well

Well July was a rough month for my family. We lost my dear aunt Nancy in tragic circumstances early in the month. It was kind of unexpected. As sad as it is losing her I know that she is with her parents, my grandma and grandpa and where she is experiencing a great love and understanding that she really needs. We were all there when she passed and that room was filled with love and peace. That is what is so amazing about the power of the Savior to give comfort to a family in a truly horrible situation. I am grateful for that. I don't know what I would do without it. That love and peace is so valuable to me and I am so glad to know it. What a blessing.
So as you read from the title I am a little frustrated, not mad, but sad. I recently was channel surfing and stopped on a local religious station where there was a 30 minute show all about how bad the Mormons are and how wrong they are. So I don't care that they don't share the same beliefs and I respect their beliefs, but seriously why don't you use those 30 minutes to talk about your beliefs instead of bashing another? I don't get it. I love other religions and respect their beliefs. We actually share similar beliefs if you really look at it. Also people think we are a hating religion, but that is not true. Yes there are some Mormons who say stupid things and are judgemental, but that is in other religions as well. For example people think we hate gay people. That is not true. I have an aunt who is gay and I love her. I also love her wife and their child. I don't hate them or not associate with them, in fact I am close to them. It is sad when some LDS people shun their family members who are gay. I know that our Father in Heaven loves them just as much as He loves me. I know He would be saddened by treating them badly. I do not fully understand why the Lord has said what He has about it, but I cant deny the other truths about the Gospel that I have prayed and fasted and received confirmation that it is true. One day maybe I will understand. Also it bothers me people say that President Monson is a hateful man. The prophet would be the first person to give anyone, drug addict, prostitute, or just an ordinary man a hug and say they are loved by him and the Lord. Finally I am also tired of the LDS people who say hateful things. They make us other Mormons who are doing their best to love everyone, respect and not judging them a bad wrap. I just wish they really worked better at understanding the Gospel deeper instead of living the cultural way. There is a difference. Oh well I must love the judgemental people as well. That is all I can do right? My flaw is I can be judgemental to judgemental people. Something I am working on!
This next month I hope to be a better one. I am turning one year older and going to Oregon, so that is exciting. Even though July has been a sad month for me, I am still pretty happy. The Lord has given me the strength to get through and continues to do so. I will always be grateful for this. I have a great family and a great life. What more can a girl ask for or need?