New year New goals

Last year my goal was to make it to the Temple. Did that and received much joy by continuing to go every week. That was they only goal I had, so this year I have goals in different areas in my life. First spiritual goals are continue to work on recognizing the spirit. I am great at it when it comes to teaching in church, in my other calling, and knowing the gospel is true, but guiding me in my personal choices and life, not so much. Huge example, me feeling so strongly that Andy was my eternal companion. Don't know how I felt as strongly as I did and it not be right, so that has not helped me to trust myself and knowing what is right or not in my personal decisions. Anyways working on that as well in depth and enriching scripture studies. Physical goals to run a 5K in a few months and to finally get my eating habits stable so I can get the rest of this weight off. I work out everyday, but that is not enough for the last 30lbs, so food is the final key. As well giving up my beloved Dr. Pepper, tears are in my eyes about that. :) Being a better person goals are learning to listen. Those who know me I am a talker so I want to be a better listener. My friends have said that they love that I talk but I really think I should be better at listening because I want to be a better friend. Lastly, I need to work on not swearing so much. I go through spurts in my life where I swear a lot or not at all. Now it has gotten to the point that I am not aware I am swearing and that bothers me. My fave words are the S-word, B-word, an occasional A-word and the one I say the most, good hell. So I don't think that keeps myself in tune when I keep saying "good hell" or the s-word in the car, at gym is where i mostly say them, or sometimes in casual conversation. So those are my goals this year. Wish me luck and Happy New Year everyone!!!

Christmas is the best!

What a great Christmas. It was spent with family, food and the Spirit. Nothing is better than those three things. I received great presents this year. A new coat which was very much needed, a statue of my fave princess Sleeping Beauty(thanks Camille), a story about Christmas story by my father, and a book called 21 Days Closer to Christ. My nieces and nephews reminded me how exciting Christmas can be and remembering what it is to be a child. I love having young children around now at Christmas. They make it so fun.
So my pondering of this day to celebrate the beginning of the Savior's mission on earth has been a happy one. Yes the birth is important, but it is how He lived and taught that is important. Also His death and Resurrection that is wonderful as well. But today was the day to remember that glorious night our Savior came down to redeem all men. How amazing that night must have been to see this baby be born who in 33 years would suffer and die for all man would be able to return to our Father in heaven. He came knowing He would suffer to pay our debts from our sins and make it possible to be able to repent. I love the Savior and am in continuous awe of Him. I am looking forward to this book to help me stretch and grow more spiritually. I have grown a lot spiritually already this year, but I know I have so much more to go. I want to push myself more to be in tune. Even though I can say now that I no longer just believe in the Savior, but I know He lives. I know and He is my best friend, but I want to know more and be closer to Him so I can serve Him better and do His work better. There is this quote by C.S Lewis in the beginning of this book that struck me. It says, "You are embarking on something which is going to take the whole of you". What a wonderful and scary thing to know. I am excited, but know I am going to be pushing myself to grow in ways that may seem hard or uncomfortable, but it will be worth it and it will be beautiful in the end. So that is what I have pondered this Christmas and looking forward to growing more. Merry Christmas friends!

Trying to lose the rest of this weight sucks!

I have been trying to lose weight on and off for about two years now. I have lost almost about 80lbs now, but I am 30lbs away to the goal i want. I started off wanting to get down to a size 16, but now I am so close to being so that I changed it to get to a size 12. Today I put on a dress I haven't worn since 2002 and it fit. I got excited after a lot of hard work is paying off, but it is still hell. I am changing not only exercising almost everyday, but my eating habits. The hardest thing for me is giving up Dr. Pepper. I love, love, love my Dr. Pepper. I have 3 a day, I know that is horrible, but I used to drink 6, so i have improved. I hope you will give me some credit on trying to conquering this addiction!:) Now I am giving it up. I bought 5 12 packs yesterday and when those are gone no more Dr. Pepper for me. A sad, sad day in my life, but I have to for my health and weight loss. I also have been working on my eating habits that I have had for 20 years. That is hard, but I am determined to be a healthy person. I don't want to be super skinny, just healthy. Also my friends and family are pushing me to run a 5K. So I think that is going to be a goal I set for myself even though I loathe running with a huge passion!!!!! But with that said, it is a good clear goal for me to just try. I am getting huge on just trying and giving things a chance lately. I did that with the Gospel two years ago, to try to live it fully and not partly, and now look how I have changed and grown into this happy, calmer person. I think it is important to do all you can in this life and live it. So fat on my body that is being so stubborn to come off. You have been warned that this is going to be the biggest battle yet. I just wish you would be more of a team player like you were for the first 70lbs. That fat came off fast, but no, now you have to be difficult. Well I can be too!!! Wish me luck everyone!!!

Spiritual Milestones

I was thinking a lot about milestones in every aspect of life lately (have not been sleeping well so my mind is thinking a lot. I just hope people who read this don't think I am oh so serious now because again I am very balanced. I am just growing a lot spiritually this year, crazy fast. I am making up for all those years I screwed around :)). It is funny where my brain goes to tie up random thoughts I have had through out many weeks. One of my primary kids got baptised over the weekend and I thought she is now having one of the spiritual milestones that we must have in life to learn from and get to the next step. My uncle who passed away is having another spiritual milestone by going on to the next life. I had a milestone 8 months ago by receiving that awesome gift of my endowments in the temple. Those are all amazing happy milestones that we get to experience in this life and even in the next. We also have to have those sad milestones. A few weeks ago I was in Deseret Book looking around. For those who know me I am not a person who usually cries. I am not emotional at all, that being said I was looking at all the amazing pictures of the Savior. My heart was full of love then I saw the painting called Against the Wind by Liz Lemon Swindle. I started to get teary eyed right there in the store. Why you ask, a girl who rarely cries unless I am really hurting, well I looked at that painting and I know exactly how that feels to be drowning and our Savior is holding on to you, trying to hold you up. Trying to pull you out, grasping so hard, being so scared and to be lifted up finally embracing my Savior. I have such a love for my big brother. He is my best friend and I am eternally grateful to Him for holding on to me and never letting go. Every time I think of Him or see a painting of Him I get teary eyed which I love but also find strange since again I have never ever been like this until recently. My family teases me about it. I guess it is funny to see how I have changed :). Anyways as embarrassing as that story may be the other day it hit me that we also have to hit that hard trial and know what it feels like to have the Lord hold on to you even when you want to let go, He never will. He may loose His grip a little because sometimes we need to fight on our own, but He is there supporting us. Anyways it is another spiritual milestone that we all have to have to grow spiritually. As crappy as it can be, but it is for our own good. My last thought is we all have to allow our hearts open to for us to hit our milestones, but our Lord also gives us many chances to do so. If we miss it once, He will allow us to do it again until we get it. We are all our on our own awesome journey of learning. I am glad of this because I remember when I was in my early 20's and I could have hit one and I didn't until recently. If He gave us only one chance, man I would be screwed!!! So this is what happens when random thoughts become one in the strange, but pretty cool brain of Amy. ( I just hope it makes sense to all of you because it always makes sense to me, but i do get that others may get lost.)

A Milestone in my Career

I have hit a major achievement in my career, so before I reveal what it is I first have to thank some people. First my high school teacher who took me to a child care facility knowing that I would be good at teaching children and helped me get my first teaching job. Second all the kids I have taught over the years, without you this would not be possible. Third, all the teachers who have trained me and helped me become the teacher I am today and I am continuing to grow and learn from other professionals. So what is this milestone I have made in my 11 years of teaching young children you ask? Well as of today I have potty trained my 200th child. Yes, I have trained 200 young children how to use the toilet. Crazy huh? I did the math today during my lunch. I was bored and I just had a kid today who got the hang of it and so I was like, hmm how many kids have I potty trained? Truly an accomplishment I will continue to brag about for the rest of my life and more children will be added to that number in the coming years. I know you are all jealous of my major accomplishment, I can feel it! :)
Also I realized I haven't really updated on me lately besides my spiritual things, so I thought I would take a moment to do so. Well, still socially awkward, but continuing to work on trying to be a little less. Not that I will ever be completely not awkward socially, but a little less would be super great. Also still working on losing these last 30lbs. Kicking my butt hard with slow results, but will continue to kick butt. Also after many years of not really having a celebrity crush because I really don't watch a lot of TV, but someone got me hooked on the show the vampire diaries and I fell fantasy in love with the actor on there. I really could stare at him all day and never get bored. I'm really not in love with him, I just like looking at him, so basically I am in visual lust with him. I don't want to know anything about him or any of that crap, again I just enjoy looking at him. I mean maybe I would like to make out with him once or twice and I think could die happy and completely satisfied with my life!! Just Kidding. So that is the update of me, still happy and truly loving my simple life that some may see as boring, but I live life with a great love and appreciation that is so simply perfect. Learning all I can, loving as much as I can, growing in scary new awesome ways as a human being, and just love being plain ordinary. I believe that being an ordinary person is truly extraordinary. I don't need to do a lot of amazing things to matter in this life. Loving and serving the Lord the best I can, being kind to others, work hard on everything I need to, and working on always trying to be the best person in this life is all I feel that matters. Life is good in the life of Amy!!!

A day to feel grateful

Today is Thanksgiving and for those who know me I am a person who ponders a lot. I have been pondering about my great life. I really do have more than I probably deserve. I have a great family, even though I am the black sheep and they sure love to tease me, they love me and are there for me when I need them. I have a great job and work with great people. I have a great class this year who I just love. I love my callings Primary and even my hard one Young Single Adult rep. I am grateful for the pushing the callings give to me to be better and rely more on the Lord to help do his work. I find much joy and happiness in teaching the gospel, even when it gets hard, but I can not think of anything else I rather be doing. I am grateful to live so close to so many temples that I get to go to twice a week. I know that this is a huge blessing that I hope I will never take for granted. The temple has brought so much light into my life and has changed me I feel forever. I am grateful that I have loved and continue to be capable to love even when heartbreak happens that I can look on loving someone as a positive experience and to look past the heartbreak and see it as a experience I will never regret even when it turned out not the way I felt it would. I am grateful for my fears without them I wouldn't have a reason to keep pushing myself to be better and to conquer them. Lastly I am grateful for my Savior. His love and grace has saved me and I will always be grateful for that. I would not have this joy in this life without Him and I will never forget that He has a great hand in my life. I love Him with all my heart and gladly serve Him in every way I can. What a truly blessed life I have. Happy Thanksgiving to all.

Families are Forever

These last two weeks have been a sad one and yet happy at the same time. My uncle Mike had a stroke during his surgery to fix a broken bone. He was recovering and was put in a care facility where they forgot to clean his catheter and he went into septic shock. He could not recover and sadly he passed away last night. I am sad, but it is harder to see my mom go through losing her brother before she expected it. During these last few weeks I have had some pretty amazing experiences. After his surgery and before we knew things were going to get better at that time and before the septic shock, we visited. I was sitting there thinking how sad this was when I felt my Grandpa Burt's spirit enter the room. At first I was like, wait am I really feeling this. I then began to cry and knew it was real. I asked if it was him and I heard a voice say, "yes I am here". Freaked me out, but not scary freak out, freak out that I am not used to this. I have been somewhat in tune before and not in tune at all. To now be in tune, (not fully in tune but in tune for this), I am getting used to it. Then last week when we knew my uncle was going to die we went to visit him in his home. In that room I felt my grandma now. She was there strongly and when leaving I let my cousin know. While I was telling her I got a very strong impression to tell my cousin that my Grandma loved her. Again, freaked out because I am not used to it. If only I was in tune to other things that would help life choices would be a little easier and know for a fact what I am feeling is right, but I know these thing grow line upon line. I am grateful to be in tune to some things and I know that the reason is because I go to the temple every week. It helps me be in tune to those things spiritual. Being able to be in tune to my grandparents again proves that families are together forever through our Heavenly Father's plan, as the primary song says! I love that I have this knowledge and KNOW it is true. I am grateful for that knowledge. So I am sad my uncle has passed but know he is with his awesome parents again and is no longer suffering. I love my family and grateful that I have an opportunity to be with them forever. What an awesome promise God has made us if we work hard to do our best in this life. I love it!!! I ask those to pray for my cousins and aunt on losing my uncle so unexpectedly, but I know the Lord will give them peace and comfort as they mourn. Again I love my family and I wish them nothing but love and comfort during their grief. Families are Forever!!!

(so I know I have only posted spiritual things on here, but really nothing much is going on in my easy, simple, great life but these great spiritual things. I really do have other things going on and I am not church and God all the time. I am well balanced just in case anyone was wondering. But the Gospel is my main priority in life. I lived a life too long with making it only just a little and I am never going to make that mistake again because I have never been happier until I started making it a main priority. Just had to throw that in there because I realized I have mostly talked spiritual, not that that is wrong, but wanted to make sure people knew I am balanced. :) )